Rebecca Elia's Blog

All about Feminine Health, Healing, and Greece

Sunday, May 10, 2009

What Are You Creating?

This post begins with a warning. My family already knows the drill…if you hang out with a writer, prepare to be a part of the content. Before you go running off or before you pick up your cell phone to dial your attorney, let me reassure you, none of you will be identified by name…but from where else do we writers get our material? And I would also like to take this opportunity to thank you for such great content!

Honestly though, if it is posted here then it’s a universal observation, and I’m hoping that by addressing it, others will find it useful. So, here I go…

Yesterday I was at a work reunion of sorts. In my opinion, it was the best possible form that a work reunion could take. It was a loving, joyful event that brought a busload of Ob/Gyns together…a baby shower!! And not just any baby shower. This blessed baby has two of the most wonderful parents in the world—and both are Ob/Gyns! Anyway, I was in heaven. It’s, sadly, quite rare to see such amazing families being created. So many people end up as parents before they’re ready or without consciously choosing to be parents. In our profession, this is a daily event. So it’s heaven when it all works out. (I don’t think they know yet, but I’m planning on hanging out at their house—that’s where all the action is gonna be…it looked like they still have a spare bedroom…but probably not for long—I better grab it quick…everyone is gonna want to be there!)

So, I’m at this heavenly event and the first question everyone asks me is, “Where are you now?” I’m the gypsy Doc; I never stay in one place very long—so I’m asked this question even when I’m not answering a cell phone, even when the person asking the question is standing right in front of me. I’ve always been tempted to respond, “I’m standing right in front of you. Do you need a new lens prescription?” But that would be rude, so I restrain myself and answer, I’m currently unemployed (don’t tell them too much…create some drama...) Their next question is, “What are you doing?” I love answering, “I’m writing three books,” and watching their reactions. It was so much fun! I could almost see their unlived dreams reflected in their eyes. Awesome!

I’ve never liked that question, “What are you doing?” It always implies that I should be doing something, or be doing something else. When I got back from living abroad in Greece without practicing medicine, I was asked, “What did you do for eighteen months?” Even when I reassured them that there was plenty to do, my life was full, the doubt didn’t leave their eyes. Although I know that this question is usually asked without judgment and with curiosity, I can’t help but feel the need in our society for everyone to be doing something, and that something had better be something acceptable. Welcome to the western world.

The question I prefer, instead, is, “What are you creating?” This is a great question, the pay dirt question. It’s the question I love to answer. It’s usually the same question that many have pat answers for, or, if they really understand the question, will uncomfortably wiggle out of answering.

But it seems like the appropriate question for a baby shower. After all, these two wonderful colleagues of ours are creating a child, a wonderful--most likely, given his parents--brilliant child, who will make all of our lives better. What a tremendous gift, their creation. I mean, who can compete with that? Do we all shy away from that question, because we understand what it entails? Or is it just too painful for so many of us to face? Fortunately, everyone who knows me has gotten used to this discomfort—some even look forward to asking me what I’m doing. It’s their five-minute opportunity to think about the parts of themselves that they’ve put on hold, where they are in their lives. Heck, maybe they might even have a dream that night about their next creation that is waiting in the wings.

This question also brings up all of the conflicts. Too many of us are unaware of what we are unconsciously creating, and this gets us into loads of trouble. If we live in our minds, which seems to be our only socially-acceptable home, then it isn’t too long before physical symptoms surface. Not making our creations conscious, leaving things up to chance, letting nature take its course…these are all recipes for disaster.

Creating is an essential part of our nature. It occurs regardless of whether or not it is conscious.

What are you creating? What do you want to create; what do you choose to create? This could be the most powerful, fulfilling journey of your life. And next time you’re invited to answer the question, “What are you doing?” consider instead answering the unspoken question, “What are you creating?”

Happy Creating on the day dedicated to our Earthly Creators!

Happy Mother's Day!
Follow this link for creating inspiration: Jennifer Lin on Oprah


  1. I love this concept! I don't consider myself a creative person (I am awe of those who I deem truly creative), yet when you phrase it that way, of course I am!

  2. Hi Andi,
    I had to smile at your response. You, not creative? This from the person who has just launched yet another blog to help the rest of us techie newbies out? Keep it coming. We love what you create!